Hard to starboard!!!

Anyone familiar with sailing? Well, I am at the wheel of the ship and I find it difficult to maintain faith in myself.  I find that I keep on pushing the rudder hard to port, that is, focus a majority of my energy to doing well at work. Its like the first mate, in this case my wife, is calling out that we need to go hard to starboard, and I fail to notice. I don't know why its so easy to function at work, but so incredibly difficult at home. I guess its a combination of my personality, the many distractions at home, the medicine wearing off, and a general post work fatigue. Its a tough thing to face. Still, I have to try to hold it steady as she goes, which requires me to turn starboard, that is homeward, alot. I hope I can safely navigate these treacherous waters. I certainly don't want the ship to capsize.

The other side of the bored

Yet another peculiar change is taking place, as I dig deeper into the pursuit of 'normalcy'.  I find things increasingly boring, which I used to find exciting. A few examples include excessive video game playing, arguing with people just because I can, and letting my mind drift aimlessly for hours at a time. All this is leading to what will hopefully be a more balance lifestyle.

Bonus Post:
While driving to work, I was listening to New Jersey Radio. A news article I heard consisted of the following:

A school administrator in New Jersey was convicted of theft by unlawful taking for breaking into the school nurse's office, and stealing students ADHD medicine to treat his form of Adult ADHD.

I will leave this out there, without stating an opinion, because the story can be taken in a wide variety of ways. Make of it what you will.

- Mike W.

a social dragonfly?

Some people are social butterflies. I seem to be a social dragonfly. I either fly away very fast in seemingly random fashion, and become a shy or listless wall flower, or I attempt to devour a conversation, and try to control the flow. This confuses people, even those who know me. If there is a topic being talked about that I don't have knowledge or opinion about, I tend to be a bystander, and end up getting focused on something else. If I am interested in the subject, my hyperfocus comes into play, and I monopolize, and end up scaring people off. Or I end up bringing something out that seems to be completely unrelated, which leaves others scratching their heads. Its an unfortunate tendency that sometimes leaves me hung out to dry, socially speaking. This was fine when I had no spouse or child, but now I am being forced to accomodate others. I manage to some of the time, but its like squeezing into a 1/2 size too small pair of pants.

Is it live or is it ADD?

People with ADHD, and those who care about them, can sometimes go to an extreme. They will just assume that anything that an ADDer ever does wrong, or right for that matter, is because of ADD. I find this concept mind boggling, both as a human, and an ADDer who is also the father of another ADDer. Some things are a result of ADD. However, ADDers still have a life and personality that have been, and still are, affected by much more than only the chemical imbalance causing ADHD. The specifics will vary from person to person, and from one time or situation to another in the same person. The best advice I can give in this area of concern is to look at an ADDer, including oneself, as a whole and unique individual, in the same way you would any other person. Get to know the entire person, and not just the ADHD. No person should be defined by only one aspect of their life.

- Michael, the whole and unique.

BLOG PARTY!!!!!!

   We did it, myself and all of you readers! We reached the 1000 visitors mark.  I wish to extend a warm and heartfelt thank you to everyone who reads my blog. And thank you to everyone who has left comments. I will keep bringing the (hopefully) interesting posts, and I hope you will keep the visit counter rolling. Its a BLOG PARTY!!!
    I will keep looking for, and delivering more new and interesting topics in future posts. Meanwhile, feel free to look around at anything older that you may have missed, comments are welcome on any and all posts. Once again, you have my thanks

- Mike.

Ready for a challenge?

I forgot to take my medicine today. I realized that on the way into work. It was too late to turn back. Anyway, it will make for an interesting day. But instead of moaning because of my own forgetfulness, I will simply make the best of it, and hope that I am ready for a challenge. The bright side of no medicine today, if there is one, is that I will be forced to rely on my own creativity, and a little hyperfocus, to get done today what needs to be done. Since it most likely won't kill me, it will undoubtedly make me stronger. And that can't be a bad thing. I handed myself a lemon, when I forgot my medicine, but now I am going to make lemonade, by employing my energy to learn more self-control.

-Mike W.

Am I me?

I don't know if this is from ADHD or some other cause, but its noteworthy. Read on.
I sometimes have the ability, or tendency, to ' separate ' part of myself from the rest of myself. Thankfully, this is not a physical separation. Let me provide an example. Yesterday (sunday), I was operating the scoreboard at my son's wrestling meet. In order to do this, I needed to apply my hyperfocus, which thanks to ADHD I have alot of, when the situation motivates, or compels, me.  There are alot of sights and sounds around that needed to be blocked out. Thanks to my medicine, I was completely focused. Another parent came over to me and starting asking me a question about my son, which wasn't related to wrestling, specifically. I answered in a relevent and adequate way, but the amazing thing was that I did so as if it were a second person inside, while the 'me' part of myself remained completely attentive to the match I was scoring. This doesn't seem like a mental illness, more like an ability to compartmentalize into independent sides. I don't know how to explain my ability to do this. I only know that I am able to. Has anyone else ever experienced this? I look forward to hearing any of your stories.

- Mike W.